I had some moments with my girls today. Rare moments cause they were in the late afternoon, early evening, which is a time I don’t typically get to share with them. But I worked from home today, so I had some flexibility to pick them up earlier than usual. Our babysitter’s birthday is this week, so we decided to bake cupcakes for her. I can’t remember the last time all three of us were in the kitchen taking turns with the blender. It was nice. Little to no fighting, homework got done and mom even made a home cooked meal for once! I think we all felt more relaxed at the end of night.
It made me start thinking about people who work for me. Things seem to be so busy at work, that I barely have time to spend with people on my team. If we aren’t talking about a specific project, it’s a quick hello, how are you and that’s about it for the day. Yesterday, I finally got to spend some time with one of my direct reports because she kindly offered to take me to get my car that was in the shop.
Frankly, I think she realized this was her chance to get a moment with me. My undivided attention, for once.
We talked about things that had probably been brewing for weeks and connected on things that reminded us that we actually like working with each other. And we shared a moment, where we laughed, hard and realized we’re both just people, both moms trying to do our very best.
I think you have to force a moment sometimes. Not the actual moment. But I think you need to create the environment to let moments happen. The truth is, they don’t take much, maybe just us slowing down a bit.
So, think about someone you’ve been trying to connect with or have felt disconnected from. It may be a co-worker, your kids, a friend, your mom. I don’t know but I know that I’m not the only busy one and I’m not the only feeling like some days I’m missing out on the moments. Just slow down long enough in the presence of that person to create a space where connecting is easy. Trust me. That moment will be worth whatever else you think you’re missing.
Now, that’s how single mom’s lean in!
The Single Mom's Guide to Leaning In 